


(Viral Dreams) Turned Dreams Into An Empire

by Lilsciencequeen



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: AU, BAMF Jemma Simmons, Drama, F/M, Feels, Implied/Referenced Torture, Inhuman!Jemma, Mind Reader, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Superpowers, Suspense, Telepathy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2017-09-20
Packaged: 2018-08-12 11:04:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7932220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilsciencequeen/pseuds/Lilsciencequeen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When something from Jemma's past resurfaces, something she hoped she had buried long ago, she's forced to deal with it head on, and is thrown into a situation she never wanted.</p>
<p>Leo Fitz is one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s key engineers and has learnt to move on from an accident in his past.</p>
<p>But when a deadly secret threatens the world, these two geniuses are forced to team up and confront the issue before it gets any worse.</p>
<p>And along the way, they learn more about themselves and maybe, just maybe, they fall for each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Unlike most of my other fics, this won't be angst heavy and have a more drama style centric plot. Hope you enjoy this one!

The kettle boiled and she sighed, pouring the liquid into the mug when she heard it.

The noises.

The footsteps outside of her apartment.

Her breath caught in her throat.

But it was the voices outside that caused her to drop the mug, the ceramic shattering on the wooden floor.

She needed a way to escape, to get out of there before it was too late.

The door to her apartment was a major no. Not with the people outside it.

The air vents… too small.

The fire escape.

That could work.

Before she knew what she was even really doing, she pulled up the window, and swung one leg over the ledge, and then the other.

The night air was cold, and goose bumps crept up her arm. She shivered, then started to make her way down, the metal clanging underfoot.

Two floors down, she saw them.

A figure in the distance. She shook her head, annoyed but slightly impressed. They were clever, extremely clever.

The figure approached her, tall, blonde.

“We’re not here to hurt you,” she said, and all Jemma could do was try not to laugh. The gun raised and pointed at her begged to differ. “Please, come with us, we’ll explain everything.”

Jemma shook her head. “No, not again. I’m not going to be a prisoner, not again.”

The blonde looked at her, as if trying to figure her out, trying to figure out what she was saying. “Who do you think we are?”

“Hydra, A.I.M., Roxxon, does it matter? You’re all the same.”

“We’re not any of them. We’re S.H.I.L.D. We can help you. We want to help you.”

She shook her head again. “No. For the first time in ten years, I’m free. I’m not a prisoner, not any more. And I won’t be. Not again”

The blonde gave her a look of pity, gave an apology and then Jemma’s whole world went black.

***

“It’s her.”

“Are you sure?”

“Definitely, I wouldn’t forget someone like her. Someone with powers like hers.”

“But, Phil, it’s been years since you…”

“It’s her.”

The answer seemed final, and Jemma felt her stomach tighten. She knew they were talking about her and she recognised one of the voices.

The male one.

The one they called Phil.

There was something about him.

Something that seemed familiar to her.

She opened her eyes, taking in her new surroundings, her new prison.

It was glass, a bed along one wall, a chair and desk along another.

It was larger than the others she had been in.

But it was still a prison.

“You’re awake then?” a voice asked.

The blonde woman from earlier. She had a pair of handcuffs in her hand. A look of regret and pity was worn across her face.

Jemma was definitely a prison here, despite all that they were thinking.

***

She sighed, bored almost.

It wasn’t the first time that she had been here, in this position.

And with her life, it probably won’t be the last.

The man who sat in front of her was her was the one from earlier.

Phil.

He gave her a smile as if trying to show her that he was a friend, that he meant no harm to her.

And she was inclined to believe him.

But she still didn’t trust him. She was reluctant to trust him, after all that she had suffered, after all that she had been through.

“Ms. Steranko,” he greeted, trying to make her feel welcome. Trying to make her feel reassured. “Or should I say, Dr. Simmons?”

She sighed. “You know who I am?”

He nodded. “I believe that we spent some time together, a number of years ago now.”

Jemma nodded. “Hydra. They still talked about you, you know. They dedicated… they named that information about you. The Coulson Protocols, but that’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”

Coulson nodded, shifting the papers to the side of the desk. “We need your help Jemma. I know what Hydra did to you, to get that information. What the information is. And I don’t think I need to tell you how bad it would be if it was used.”

A pause. He was wanting her to speak. “You don’t.”

He nodded in sombre agreement. “They haven’t used it in the years they had it. We take that as good, but one of our agents has found that the drive is for sale now. And if it falls into the wrong hands…”

“You want me to get it?”

He nodded. “We’ve wanted you to work for us for years now Jemma. You are an extraordinary woman. Two doctorates. You could be useful to us.”

“You want me to work for you?” Coulson nodded. “Then why the handcuffs?” She raised her hands, still cuffed together.

He gave a heavy sigh, then un-cuffed her. She rubbed her wrists, glad to be free. “It was a precaution. Protocols.”

She raised an eyebrow, trying to decider his thoughts. “Why should I trust you?”

Coulson looked at her. He knew she would be apprehensive, after all that she had suffered, after all that she had experienced in the past. “You can read my mind, you know that I’m not lying. You also know that S.H.I.E.L.D. won’t hurt you. You know that we help people like you, work with people like you.”

She continued to stare at him, working him out. Then finally she spoke. “Will you promise me my safety?”

Coulson nodded. “You’ll be safe here.”

She was reluctant. She didn’t want to do this at all, but there was too much at stake. And she was responsible for that, and if worse came to worse, she didn’t want to think about that. “Then I’ll help.”

He extended his hand out. “Welcome to Level One.”


	2. Chapter 2

The Helicarrier was massive, much bigger that she had first suspected, but thankful there was clear signage everywhere, and she was glad of that.

She still wasn’t overly happy that she was here.

She was only here because of what had happened.

Her mess.

And she needed to help clean it up.

She knew just how dangerous it would be if those protocols, if that information was released to the public.

To those who could do damage.

Cause pain.

Suffering.

Coulson had said that she was going to be part of his team, that he would be calling a meeting later that day to discuss what they knew and any possible courses of action they could take.

But first he had told her to get something to eat, giving her directions to the canteen, telling her it had been at least 12 hours since she must have eaten last and that the food here was simply extraordinary.

Making her way down the corridors, fingers trailing along the walls, she allowed herself to catch glimpses of what was running through the over agents’ minds (something she rarely did, allowed herself to, but she had to know that she was safe here, that she was in no danger); their worries, their hopes, their fears. Everything.

So many thoughts.

So much life here.

So much everything… unlike Hydra.

A.I.M.

Roxxon.

Hydra.

All those places, all the thoughts had been those of evil, full of pain and suffering…

They still haunted her.

And, she feared, they always would.

Shaking her head, she continued her way to the canteen.

***

“You’re on Coulson’s team, aren’t you?” asked a voice, female. Jemma looked up and saw another woman sliding into the chair in front of her. There was something familiar about her but Jemma couldn’t remember where she had seen her.

Of course, she could always read the woman’s mind, find out everything about her, and her deepest darkest secrets.

But, no. She wasn’t going to do that. She rarely used her gift, or curse as she referred to it.

People kept things a secret for a reason, and having had her powers used against her, she didn’t trust herself with them unless she _had_ to use them.

“Daisy,” the woman said extending her hand. “Daisy Johnson.”

That was it.

Daisy Johnson.

_The Daisy Johnson._

“Jemma Simmons.”

Daisy nodded at her. “Everyone here knows who you are. All, and I mean _all_ , the science division are obsessed with your work. Have been wanting to work with you for years now.”

“Really?” Jemma asked. This couldn’t be true, could it?

After all she had done, people still admired her, still wanted to work with her.

But then again, they didn’t know what had happened to her.

What Hydra had done to her.

And by default, what she had done.

“Mmmhh,” Daisy confirmed, mouth full of the sandwich she was eating. She swallowed before continuing. “We’ve been wanting your brains with us for years now.”

“And now I’m here.”

Daisy nodded in agreement. “And now you’re here.” She looked as though she was about to say something else but then there was a buzzing noise. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a phone. Tapping on it, her eyes scanned the screen. She cursed then stood. “Listen, Jemma, I’ll see you later, at the meeting with Coulson. He has told you about that, hasn’t he?” A nod from Jemma prompted her to continue. “I’ll see you there then, Nat needs to talk to me about something. See you then.”

Jemma nodded. “I’ll see you later.”

Daisy smiled before jogging across the canteen, leaving Jemma alone in this alien world.

***

Coulson had been kind enough to give her directions for the meeting that afternoon, and she had an idea of where she was going (really, this Helicarrier had excellent signage) but she had hoped that she would bump into Daisy, she wasn’t too keen on going in alone…

But that was life she supposed.

“Just stop,” came a voice.

Male.

Scottish.

And by the sounds of it, completely done with everything and everyone.

It was coming from behind a door that was slightly ajar on her left.

And despite all her better judgement, she pushed it open and saw that there were three agents in there.

“Just,” said the voice again, coming from what she guessed was a male senior agent. “Leave. Please?”

The other two agents stood up and pushed past her, and out into the corridor.

The man, agent, turned to look at her. Smiling.

And she instantly felt her heart constrict at the sight of him. He was handsome, looked about the same age as her, and had blue blue eyes.

“Hello?” he asked, making it more a question than greeting.

She smiled hello. “Are you okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah, yeah…” he reached, and rubbed the back of his neck.

“I just, I just…”

“Do you need help?” she asked.

He smile at this, a bright smile that seemed to light up the whole room. “Have you ever fixed a faulty engine on an Helicarrier before?”

Jemma laughed, shaking her head. “I can change a car tyre.”

He nodded, shrugging. “Good enough for me. Probably have a better idea than those idiots.”

She frowned at him at this comment. “Well-meaning idiots,” he decided on before beckoning her closer to him.

She knelt down next to him, and with some instruction from him, they were able to get the components working again.

“We make a good team,” he commented, sitting back on his heels, wiping his forehead and getting grease everywhere.

“We do. And,” she pointed to his face. “You have a little something there.”

He tried to wipe it away but only resulted in getting more grease there. “Better?”

She shook her head laughing. “I never caught your name.”

He extended one oil stained hand. “Fitz.”

“Simmons.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So they have finally met. Dun Dun Dun.  
> And changing a care tyre is totes like being able to fix a Helicarrier...  
> Thanks for reading, and hope you enjoyed!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it has been a while since an update but I do want this done by the end of the month, so expect regular updates from next week as the next 7/8 days are really busy for me. Thanks for all the support with this so far, hope you enjoy!

“I know, I know who you are.”

“You do?” she asked.

He nodded. “Yeah, course I do. Why wouldn’t I?”

She shrugged.

“You had your second doctorate at the age of seventeen. You were so famous and then, then you just disappeared.”

She winced at this, and it didn’t take long for him to catch on that something was making her uncomfortable. “You okay?” he asked.

It took her a moment to snap back to reality, she knew that she had worried him. But he didn’t know why. Why she hated the day she came home after finding out she had received her second doctorate.

How her life had changed after that night.

“Yeah,” she finally replied. “Yeah, I’m okay, thanks.” She gave a small, nervous smile and rubbed at her left eye. She knew that Fitz could probably see through it, the lie, but if he did, he said nothing.

“You’re here for Coulson, aren’t you?”

She nodded. “Yeah, no idea where I’m going though.” She gave a nervous laugh.

“Sure, I’ll help you.”

“You will? I won’t be distracting you from anything important, will I?”

He smiled at her. “Nah, I’m part of the team also.”

She lit up at this. “You are?”

“Yeah, have you met anyone else on the team yet?” he asked as he lead her out of the room, and down the corridor.

“Yeah, I’ve met Coulson and Daisy just.”

“Daisy,” Fitz said. “I think you’ll like her. She’s quite something.”

“Are you two…”

It took a moment for Fitz to catch on. “Us two? Together? God no, she’s one of my best friends but she’s a boyfriend. Trip, he’s part of this mission actually.”

“Anyone else?”

Fitz paused for thought. “There’s Bobbi, tall blonde. Not sure if you’ve met her.”

Jemma nodded, laughing. “I think I have. I think she helped to bring me here.”

“Bobbi’s amazing.”

“She put me in handcuffs.”

Fitz frowned at this. He didn’t know what yet, but there was something about her. Something that Coulson hadn’t yet told him about her. All he knew was that she was an asset on this mission, helping them out…

“Which way is it?” Jemma’s question knocked him out of his thoughts. It turns out he had stopped at a turning.

“Oh left.”

***

Ten minutes later, they were sitting around the table, Coulson at the head, with Bobbi, Daisy and her boyfriend Trip, with another woman that Jemma did not recognise that must have been the Melinda May that Fitz had told her about.

And she sat beside Fitz, with Daisy on her other side.

“So, what are they?” Daisy asked. “The Coulson Protocols?”

Jemma felt the nerves settle in.

“They were created a number of years ago, by Hydra. It was created by them as a way of defeating superheroes.”

Daisy frowned. “Why? How did they even get that information?”

“From me.”

Everyone stared at him, except Jemma, who stared at her lap.

“You made these Coulson?” Bobbi was horrified. She knew a lot about him but this… this was new. “How?”

Before Coulson could speak, Daisy did, and she was furious. “Coulson… are we on this list?”

He nodded. “You are. You are powered and that’s the only reason why. But this was before I knew you and I never meant to make them.”

It looked like she wanted to say something but Trip placed a hand on her arm to calm her. “Hear him out, there has to be a reason for them.”

“There is,” Coulson said, and continued. “I was kidnapped by Hydra those years ago, you know that. And you know the extraction op. Some of you were even on it. And Hydra had some technology that we didn’t know about at the time, and they still do.”

“The memory machine.” It was Fitz who spoke up. “They took the memories from you.”

Coulson nodded. “Yes. And the reason I had the ideas about how to… how to subdue superheroes. We know what has happened in the past, with the likes of Garett and Ward. We couldn’t have another case of that.”

Daisy shook her head, and Jemma could sense the anger radiating of her. “This is wrong,” Daisy muttered. And all Jemma knew was that she had to get out of there.

“I’m sorry,” she said, trying to keep her breathing calm, the last thing that she wanted to happen was for it to get out of control, to take a panic attack. “I need… I need air.”

And she fled the room.

***

She didn’t know, nor care, where she was going, all she wanted was out of that room.

She took corridor after corridor, and staircase after staircase until she found herself on the roof of the Helicarrier, the wind whipping her hair around her.

And she left out a sob, but no one seemed to hear her.

The wind was too loud and the sounds of the jets also helped to hide it.

After some walking around, with no one even so much as casting a second glance at her, she found a spot to sit down in.

She leaned her head against the metal behind her, allowing the tears to flow.

She shouldn’t be here.

Not all.

She should be at home, watching TV and trying to forget her past, and all that she had done.

Not here.

Not working with the people that she had hurt.

After some time of pitying herself, she heard a voice ask her name. “Jemma?”

She looked to her left and saw that Fitz was knelt there, and adjusting himself so that he was sitting beside her. “You okay?”

She shook her head. “I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t be helping. I just shouldn’t…”

“Hey,” he whispered, leaning forward and wiping away one of her tears, Jemma didn’t do anything to stop him. “That’s stupid, don’t say that. You have every right to be here, but you can also leave, you know that.”

“I have to stay here and clean this up. Stop anything from happening. This is my mess Fitz,” she said, and saw him pause, and look at her in shock.

“What do you… Jemma, what do you mean?”

She took a breath. “Fitz, I created the Coulson Protocols.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another surprise update! Whooo! I was supposed to do this earlier this week but I wanted to get my season 4B stuff up first. Next chapter should be up soon. Also, apologises for a lot of dialogue and references to the past. I just wanted to get Jemma's story out.

He stared at her, blinking and she repeated the words. “It was me. I created the Coulson Protocols.”

“How?” he asked.

“It’s…It’s  complicated,” she said, shrugging.

“I don’t mind,” he said, standing up and offering her a hand.

She frowned at it, and he smiled. “Let’s get inside, get you coffee to warm you up as I’m not sure about you, but I’m bloody freezing out here. And you can tell me everything, or as little as you want. It’s up to you.”

She took it, and he helped her up, and once she was standing, she didn’t let go of his hand. She allowed her hand, her fingers to remain interlaced with his. If he found it unusual or strange, he never said anything. He allowed her to hold his hand, and together they walked back into the Helicarrier.

“Fitz?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I have tea instead.”

***

The cafeteria was not empty but it wasn’t as full as it had been earlier. Jemma had taken a seat in the corner of the room, while Fitz was up getting their drinks.

“Hey,” he said, sliding into the seat opposite her and passing her the cup. “I got you a brownie, I wasn’t sure if you wanted one.”

“Thanks,” she said, and cut a piece of the food with the edge of her fork and ate it. “I’ll tell you… I’ll tell you as much as Coulson knows.”

He nodded. “I… don’t say anything you’re not happy with.”

“I’m… I’m Inhuman Fitz. I can… I can read minds. But I never use my powers. I was changed… I was changed when I was young. I was never supposed to go through the Mist. But it was an accident. And my father… he never forgave himself for what I suffered. So we fled, we hid. He was also… he was also Inhuman. He could heal. It was just me and him for so many years. In those years, I got my first doctorate. No one knew about my power, they couldn’t. It was hard enough being a young female scientist… and if they knew that I could read minds. I could never have achieved it. But I was happy. Me and dad. I got to see so much of the world. I got to help people. That’s all I wanted. But the night… the night I got my second doctorate…” She stopped, trying to compose herself.

“It’s okay,” Fitz said, “Just take your time.”

She nodded, and wiped away a tear. “He was dead. I came home and found him dead. And I knew who it was. They left… they took me from the house. Roxxon.”

Fitz frowned. “Roxxon?” He knew that Roxxon were dangerous. He knew they had killed but he had no idea what they wanted with Jemma.

She nodded. “It was mum’s brother. My uncle. He wanted to do better than the competition. And he thought that I was the way. I still don’t know how they found out about my powers.”

“Did you mum not say anything.”

“No. Mum… mum died when I was young. Dad… dad had crystals. He was one of the few that the Elders trusted with them, and mum… she was always jealous. She wanted powers. She tried to give herself them but she couldn’t.”

“She wasn’t Inhuman.”

“She died.”

“I’m sorry,” Fitz said, knowing it was worthless.

“Thank you. Dad, dad smashed the crystals, wanting no one else to get hurt. He didn’t want to lose me like how he lost her.”

“But you were in the room?” Fitz guessed.

And Jemma nodded, confirming that he was correct. “Thankfully, I had the marker but dad never forgave himself for what I went through, but that was the past. I was seventeen when Roxxon took me, and for three years I was there. I escaped just after I was twenty…” She trailed of as if she were about to say something but she never. Fitz never pressed, knowing that Jemma was saying a lot, and just how hard it was to reveal your past like that. “Then I was with AIM… Two years, after that I was with Hydra.”

“The Coulson Protocols.”

Jemma nodded. “They could never get them, the thoughts from Coulson, not directly.”

“The implant.” Then Fitz realised. “Hydra took them from you.” Of course that was it, the memory machine wouldn’t have been able to take them directly from Coulson himself, but someone with powers… someone like Jemma could have taken them from him.

Jemma nodded, tears in her eyes. “I can control my powers. But sometimes, when there are certain… certain variables and…” she couldn’t finish what she was saying.

“They tortured you, lowered your mental barriers, and took them from you, using the memory machine.”

Jemma nodded and was now crying. “I caused so much pain, and hurt. Those protocols… they can fall into the wrong hands…”

“Hey,” he whispered. He stood up and made his way around the table, taking the seat beside her. He wrapped his arms around her and she collapsed into him, allowing all her emotions to overflow. “I don’t care, I don’t care about what you’ve done in the past. What has happened. If you don’t believe my words, then look into my mind. Use your powers and you’ll see that I don’t care.”

She nodded into his shoulder. “M’sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise. We all have a past, something that has happened to us, myself included and sometimes, we’re forced to do something that we don’t want to do. And I’m never, we’re never going to judge you for what you’ve done in the past. And anyone who does, they don’t deserve to know you Jemma. I may have only known you a few hours, but I’ve read all your work. You’re something… you’re amazing.”

She pulled back, and he reached over, gently and wiped away her tears. And that was when their eyes met, her brown ones with his blue ones. And there was something there, something extraordinary there, something between the two of them.

His hand, still resting on her cheek, cupped it and she looked at him, tears glittering on her eyes lashes. She gave a watery smile. He smiled back at her when…

“Agent Fitz, Doctor Simmons?”

His hand dropped from her cheek, and he looked over her shoulder, at someone who was standing there. “Mike. Is everything okay?”

The other agent nodded. And was about to speak when Jemma spoke first.

“Is that Deathlok technology?”

Mike nodded. “It is. Are you familiar with it?”

Jemma swallowed hard, looking between him and Fitz, who had gone back to looking at her with a nervous glance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have gotten this all planned out so the next update should be before Monday/Tuesday. Thanks for checking out and I hope you enjoyed this. Your support means the world to me.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, I did want this up earlier but stuff just happened. But here it is, and I hope that you enjoy!

“Jemma?” Fitz asked, once she had been silent for a period of time. He must have sensed that there was something wrong, that there was something off about her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I am, thanks.” She looked at him, again, and gave an uneasy smile. “I just…” She had been put on the spot, something that she hated. “AIM tech, wasn’t it?”

Mike nodded. “Yeah, it was. As much as I don’t like them, they saved my life. You spent time with them?”

Jemma gave a bitter laugh. “Unfortunately. Two years before they sold me onto Hydra as if I were nothing more than something that could be bought and sold.” She rolled her eyes. “But that… that was in the past, it’s done. It’s done now.” She reached for her tea, and took a drink before changing the conversation. “Thank you Fitz. For taking me in here. You’re right. It was freezing outside.”

“Yeah…yeah it was.” He reached for his own tea and was about to take a drink when Daisy came barging into the room.

“There you two are,” she exclaimed. “I’ve been looking for you. We have a hit on the drive.”

“You found it?” Jemma asked, feeling relieved. Because the sooner that this mission was over, the sooner she could get home and put all this behind her (though a whisper at the very back of her mind told her that this wasn’t necessarily what she wanted to do).

Daisy nodded. “Yeah, some fancy auction. Coulson has all the details.”

Jemma looked at Fitz, who stood and extended a hand to her. “Let’s go.”

***

Back in the briefing room, Coulson seemed relieved that they were back safe, but cast Fitz a glance as if to say that seemed to say ‘we’ll discuss it later’.

“Right,” he began, bringing up a picture behind him of the drive. “This is our target. It’s to be sold at auction in six hours, at some science gala. We have the funds to buy it, as we can’t lose it. No matter how much it costs. But that’s a back up plan. May, Bobbi, you two are going in to take the drive under their noses. That is the preferable method.”

“What’s the non-preferable method?” Daisy asked, leaning forward in her seat as if she were excited at the prospect of something.

“We buy it. Fitz, Jemma, you two know this stuff better than most of us, so you two will be going in, undercover, and aiming to purchase it if all else fails. Daisy, you’ll be running comms with me.”

Jemma looked horrified at this idea. “But I can’t… I don’t know how to work undercover.”

“Simple,” May said. “You stay with Fitz, and he’ll answer any questions. Once the auction begins, simply take your seats and don’t stop bidding until you win.”

“You don’t have to do this Jemma,” Coulson said, seeing her unease. “But just think, once it’s done, and we have the drive you can go home.”

Even though Jemma didn’t yet know where, or what, home was, she nodded. “I’ll do it.”

***

“Hey,” she whispered, standing at the door to the room in which he was changing. “You okay?”

He spun, looking around at her, and he was so incredibly handsome in the suit.

But his tie wasn’t yet tied, it was just hanging around his neck. He gestured to it. “I just…” he sighed. “I’ve not told you something Jemma. Something important about me.”

“That’s okay,” she said, leaning against the doorframe.

“No, it’s not. You’ve told me so much about you, that its time I was honest about myself. A number of years ago, someone who used to work here, Grant Ward…”

“Was that who was mentioned earlier?”

“Yeah, yeah. He was Hydra, but none of us knew. And we have medical pods. They’re metal boxes just, used for transporting those who need medical care. He… he trapped me in one, once I found out. Tried to kill me. Dropped me in the ocean. I survived somehow, but my body. I was in a coma for nine days, and left with brain damage. I’m… I’m still getting used to it. But I don’t…”

“You don’t like ties around your neck. It reminds you of not being able to breathe.”

“Yeah, I know… I know it’s stupid.”

She shook her head. “It’s not.”

“No?”

“No. It’s not. It’s natural Fitz.” She took slow, small steps into the room towards him and took the end of the tie in her hands. “Yeah?” she asked.

He nodded, feeling her breath. “Yeah.”

She smiled and went about tying his tie; not so tight that it would remind him of drowning but not so lose that it would be deemed inappropriate for the auction.

Once she was done, she stayed there, and he lifted his hands, brushing the loose strands of hair back behind her ear.

He then leaned in close to her, eyes closed and just before their lips could meet, when the end of their noses were ghosting over each other’s a voice at the door interrupted them.

May. “Time to go.”

And they pulled apart.

***

They arrived at the auction on time, and Fitz allowed his hand to slide around Jemma’s waist. She didn’t mind, she didn’t object, she just leaned in closer to him, and he couldn’t help but wonder if what feelings he was starting to develop for her were also something that she had.

“You okay?” he whispered into her ear as they entered the room.

“Yeah, just… just nervous.” She gave a laugh, and he just nodded.

“Yeah, that’s natural. It’s your first time undercover. It’s okay.”

“And hopefully my last,” she said.

“Hopefully. Do you want a drink?” he asked, nodding to the bar. “We’ve some time.”

“If you want.”

He nodded, then lead her towards it, helping her take a seat on a stool before taking on himself. “Is there, is there anything you want?”

She picked up a menu, and looked through the list, before settling on a cocktail while Fitz just took a beer, sliding his wallet out of his pocket to pay for them. “Are you sure?” she asked, “I can pay you back later.”

“Nah,” he shook his head. “It’s fine, my treat.”

She smiled at him as the barman slid her a bright blue drink and Fitz a bottle. “So,” he said, leaning in closer to her. “Do you know what we’re here for?” He knew that she knew, but from what he had picked up from Jemma on the journey over was that she liked knowing what was happening.

“Yes, we’re getting the drive, and that’s all.”

He smiled at her. “Perfect…”

And was about to say something else when a voice interrupted them. “Jemma?”

All colour face drained from her face, and Fitz could tell that it was someone from her past, someone she would rather remain hidden. He reached across the bar, and took her hand in his own, giving it a reassuring squeeze as the voice spoke again.

“It’s been years since I’ve seen you, how are you?”

She spun around, and Fitz did to, just to be there in case.

He recognised who was talking to her. A disgraced AIM scientist by the name of Holden Radcliffe. Just looking at him made Fitz’s blood boil. He had done some dark twisted stuff in his lifetime. And if Jemma was nervous… he could only dread to think of what had happened to her.

“It has,” she said, giving a fake smile.

He nodded, then held out his hand to Fitz who refused to shake. “Holden Radcliffe.”

“I know.”

Radcliffe pulled his hand back, then turned his attention back to Jemma as if she were some interesting science project that he had to abandon. “But _how_ are you Jemma?”

That emphasis, it seems, was that was needed for Jemma to catch on. “I’m fine,” she whispered through gritted teeth. “Now please, leave me alone.”

She stood up, and Fitz copied, wrapping his arm around her waist again and he could feel her trembling. He led her away, hoping that it would all end well.

But it never.

“You’ve not told him yet, then?” Radcliffe called out, causing heads to turn. “Just why you’re alive? What’s keeping your heart beating?”

Jemma stopped, and her shaking got worse.

“Hey,” Fitz whispered in his ear. “We can keep going if you want, heck we can even leave.”

“We can’t,” she said, tears streaming down her face. “Not now.”

He nodded. “Do you want to go somewhere, calm down for a minute?”

“I don’t know.”

“Jemma!” came Radcliffe’s voice, less aggressive this time. “Just tell him the truth, he deserves that from you at least. Just tell him why I’m the reason that you’re alive.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're about halfway through now, and I want to say a massive thank you to all you lovely people supporting this, it really makes my day!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not actually a massive fan of this chapter, it feels more like filler than anything else. I hope you enjoy this one! Thanks for checking out!

“Jemma?” Fitz asked, “Is everything okay?”

She shook her head. “No. No its not.”

“Do you…  do you want to talk about it?”

She shrugged. “I don’t… Can we get somewhere alone? Just the two of us?” She cast an anxious glance back to see if she could see Radcliffe but she couldn’t. He must have moved further into the crowd, thankfully.

He nodded. “Of course, why couldn’t we?”

“We’re on a mission.”

“That’s not important. Not right now.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, her voice low and close to breaking. He guided her out of the room, and to some side room where there was no one, and they took seats in a darkened corner.

“I never told you how I escaped Roxxon. One day, I just saw a chance and took. I fled, I had nothing, but I ran and never once did I look back, after so long I was free. But I wasn’t… not really. Roxxon weren’t going to let their star prize to get away from them. So they sent men after me.”

“You don’t have to continue, not if you don’t want to,” he told her. He could see that this was making her nervous and he didn’t want to push her to do anything that she didn’t want to. Not if it upset her.

“I have to. I kept this from you. I shouldn’t have.”

He shook his head. “No, you didn’t, I told you to tell me all that you were comfortable with. And this… if you don’t want to, you don’t have to.”

“I want to Fitz, I’m scared…”

“Scared of what?”

“That you won’t like me after.”

“Don’t be stupid.”

She nodded, took a breath and then continued. “I thought I could escape by running over the roofs of some old warehouses, but they weren’t as strong as I thought that they were and I fell… it collapsed under me. Roxxon, having seen it and the size of the drop, they gave up, cut their losses. There was no way that I should have survived that fall, it should have killed me, the impact.”

“But it never?”

She shook her head. “No one knows how, even I don’t. But there was some homeless… a group of them taking shelter in the warehouse. I must have given them quite the fright, crashing through the roof. But they saw that I was alive, and they… they went to get help….”

“Radcliffe?”

Jemma nodded. “He happened to be walking by, told them that he was a doctor and he was in. Saw that I was dying and offered to help. Told them he was taking me to the hospital but it was…”

“The nearest AIM facility?”

She nodded. “He thought that… that if he used…” She took a breath, settling her nerves. “Early, I said I knew the Deathlok technology… you thought I was reading minds or I just knew it but…”

“It’s what saved your life, isn’t it?”

“It is. But unlike… unlike Mike, all my implants are internal. They keep… they keep my heart beating. They’re the only reason that I’m alive right now.”

Fitz nodded, understanding what she had just said.

“You’re not angry?” she asked.

He frowned. “Why would I be angry?”

She shrugged. “I don’t… I don’t know.”

He just smiled at her. “It’s okay Jemma. And thank you. For telling me. You didn’t have… you didn’t have to.”

She nodded and was about to speak when an announcement ran through the building, calling any last people who wanted to attend the auction to take their seats. Jemma stood. Fitz frowned up at her, looking up at her. “You coming?” she asked. “To get the hard drive?”

***

They took their seats, not at the back, not at the front, just somewhere in the middle. Their fingers were interlaced between them as the first number of products were offered up.

They sat there in silence paying attention to the products that were being sold when halfway through the night the drive came up.

It was described by the auctioneer as the drive that held the secrets to the world, and power. Power beyond man’s (or woman’s) wildest dreams.

“Any bids?”

And so the night began in full force, with Fitz and Jemma bidding on the object.

It seemed everyone wanted it, the whole underground scientific community wanted the drive. The two scientists weren’t surprised. With it, could come power, and the chance to bend the world to their will. They could literally rule the world with it, and wipe out every powered person that existed.

So it had it had to be them. It had to be them

As it seemed that May and Bobbi hasn’t been successful at stealing the drive.

Finally, the bidders started to drop off and an hour after bidding once started, Fitz finally won the drive.

They had to wait the rest of the night to collect it, making the occasional bid to show they were there for the auction and not just to win the drive, hoping to take the attention of them.

“You ready?” Fitz asked, turning to face Jemma, and smiled, feeling slightly victorious at having won the drive. They had succeeded in their mission, everything was going to be okay.

She nodded. “Yes. Collect then back to… back home?” She changed at the last minute, with the amount of people around her she didn’t want to give anything away and ruin the mission, not when they were so close to being in the clear.

With their fingers still interlaced, they made their way up to the desk and it took some time for Fitz to sign the paperwork and show identification before they finally got the drive. And Jemma, although she was one step closer to home, found that she didn’t want to leave S.H.I.E.L.D.

Not yet anyway.

***

“Yeah, no we got it,” Fitz said down the phone to Daisy. “Yeah, no I checked it on my phone, it is the files. Okay, we’ll be back in about an hour.”

He hung up, sliding it into the jacket pocket. “You okay?” he asked her as she watched him, her eyes gliding over his face.

“Yeah, but what did… what did Daisy want?”

Fitz gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. “She wants to throw a party. She’s got food and drink, and…” he shook his head as if he were unable to believe Daisy. “She wants to celebrate a successful mission, as usual.”

“That sounds fun,” Jemma said, though there was a hint of sadness in her voice. She had never been to something like that since she was seven. Most of her life she had spent on the run, there was no chance to sit back and relax, to have fun with friends because it was just her and her father.

Yes, they did celebrate her birthday and Christmas but it was never anything big. No that it had mattered to her, she was with her father and that’s all that mattered to her. “Are you going to go?” she asked him.

He shrugged. “Probably, are you?”

She nodded. “I think… I think I will.”

He turned to her, and smiled again.

Then footsteps up ahead cased them to stop. There shouldn’t be anyone here, not down this way. Fitz placed his arm out in front of her, to stop her moving. He dropped her hand, raising a finger to his lips, warning her to be quiet, and to be careful.

He reached back, pulling the gun hidden in his waist band and raising it when the figure appeared at the end of the corridor.

“Fitz? Jemma? Is that you down there?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am following a lot of the comic plot now with the whole Jemma and Deathlok technology, as it was an interesting plot in the comic canon (like they cancelled it, I'm not bitter or anything). More should be coming this weekend


	7. Chapter 7

“Are you okay?”  the voice called again. It wasn’t one of their team and Fitz raised an arm, gesturing Jemma to keep back while he took a tentative step forward.

“Hello?” he called out, wondering who it was.

“Fitz,” the figure replied, stepping into the light. “I never thought I would see you again. I did think I saw you here. Sorry we couldn’t catch up. Long time no see and all that.”

“Ward,” the engineer breathed. “What are you doing here?”

Ward shrugged. “Isn’t it obvious? I’m here for the drive.” He nodded at what Jemma was holding, then seemed to realise just who was holding. “Jemma Simmons. I wasn’t expecting to see you here. Then again, we’ve never had the pleasure to meet.”

He took another step forward but Fitz just readjusted his aim, pointing the barrel of the gun at Ward’s chest. Ward just laughed, and raised his own, pointing it at Jemma instead.

“You won’t kill me,” Jemma whispered and caused both Ward and Fitz to look at her in shock. “I know Hydra wants me, I know how valuable I am to them. _They_ need me.”

Ward laughed. “I’ll make you a deal then Jemma.” He pointed the gun at Fitz instead. “Come with us Jemma, come embrace your true destiny. Help us make the world a better place, and I’ll let Fitz live.”

Jemma remained silent but Fitz shuffled slightly, standing in front of Jemma to protect her from Ward, to protect her from Hydra. They both knew just what Hydra was capable off, they both had suffered at the hands of Hydra. And he wasn’t going to let that happen. Not again. “Piss off,” Fitz spat and Ward laughed, shaking his head.

“You know,” Ward explained, speaking to Jemma more now and talking about Fitz in a condescending tone, but it was also one that spoke of experience. One that spoke of past times, memories that were shared. As if they were old friends and Ward was reminiscing about something. “When I first met Fitz, he wasn’t like this at all. He was timid, scared. The idea of field work, it terrified him. But I think I helped change that, made him the man he was.”

“You tried to kill him,” Jemma accused, staring at Ward in shock. “You sent him to die!”

“He told you that?” Ward asked, confusion spreading across his face. “No, no that’s not what happened.”

“You sent me to the ocean floor!” Fitz cried, disgusted. “You left me there, alone. I was in a coma, for nine days! My mum began to plan my funeral!”

Ward frowned, as if trying to work something out. “Garett wanted me to put a bullet through your brain. He couldn’t have you, so why should anyone? I gave you an easy way out. You’re alive because of me.”

“No,” Fitz disagreed, shaking his head. “No, no. You were always like this. Saying that you did what you did to protect people, to save people. Your hurt me, you tortured Bobbi.”

“She deserved that. It was her fault that Kara was killed.”

“Bobbi gave the name of the only safe house she knew was empty. She didn’t know Kara was there.”

Ward shrugged. “It all worked out in the end.”

Fitz gave a bitter laugh. “You just don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong. You do wrong and say it’s right. You can’t seem to comprehend that maybe, just maybe, what you’re doing is wrong.”

Ward sighed, one of anger and frustration. “Just let me have the hard drive and Jemma, and no one gets hurt. Give me that Fitz, and I _promise_ you that no one needs to get hurt.”

“No.” Fitz refused. If he had to die to ensure that the hard drive remained out of Hydra’s hands, and that Jemma remained safe, then so be it. That hard drive _had_ to remain out of Hydra’s hands, that they couldn’t get it. It contained details on every powered person, of everyone on the Index and if Hydra, if those who wanted to cause harm got their hands on that… he dreaded to think about the consequences.

“Fitz please,” Jemma asked, her tone pathetic. She was begging, pleading. “Let me go. Let me take it. I can’t… I can’t let you, anyone else get hurt because of me.”

“No Jems. No. The drive… it needs to remain out of Hydra’s hands. We can’t let it fall into the wrong hands and if I have to die to allow that to happen… I don’t care Jemma. I can make peace with that.”

“No,” she begged again, tears clinging to her lashes, threatening to spill. “Please Fitz.”

He turned and looked at her, and dropped the gun, the metal object clattering to the floor. He reached up and brushed a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. “Jemma, getting to know you, it’s been amazing to get to know you, and I wouldn’t change it, I wouldn’t change anything. Not at all.”

“Please,” she whispered, leaning in close to him, and allowing her forehead to rest against his. “Please Fitz. Don’t do this. Not for me. I’m not worth it.”

“Jemma,” Fitz asked, his voice wavering. “I couldn’t live if you didn’t.”

“I’d feel the same way,” she told him. “Just please, please let them take me. Let me go.”

“No,” he told her, placing a kiss to her forehead. “No Jems. No.”

Jemma looked like she was about to say something else, as if she were about to confess something but she never got the chance, as Ward spoke. “If you two love birds are done, I would love to hear your choice.”

“I’ll come with you.” Jemma pulled away from Fitz, and looked at him, raising the hard drive that she was holding. “And you can have this.”

“Please,” Fitz begged. “Jemma, please.”

“Tell the team I’m sorry,” Jemma looked at him. “Please.”

Slowly, but surely, Fitz nodded, wiping away a tear that had escaped, using the side of his finger, gently caressing her cheek.

And Jemma began walking, down the corridor and towards Ward. He smiled at her, the wicked grin of a fox and held out the hand that wasn’t holding the weapon. She passed him the hard drive and he lifted it, turning it around and examining it then suddenly…

A bang ricocheted around the corridor and Jemma braced herself for pain that never came.

Once she had gotten her bearings, she looked around and saw Fitz lying on the ground clutching at his shoulder, blood seeping around his fingers.

“You said!” Jemma cried, turning to face Ward. “You said no one needed to get hurt!”

Ward just smirked. “You believed that? Jemma, S.H.I.E.L.D., they’re dangerous, they keep lists of people like you. With Hydra, you can be safe. We can protect you.”

“Don’t listen to him,” came Fitz’s voice. “Jemma, run. Find Bobbi, Daisy, May. Just get somewhere safe.”

Jemma looked between the two of them, she had no idea what to do. Her head was starting to hurt, everything overwhelming her.

She took in a breath, trying to focus. She had to think this through: she could go with Ward, go back to Hydra; she could run, find help but risk Fitz dying or she could stay and help Fitz.

Eventually, she decided to help Fitz. She ran and knelt beside him, placing her hands over the wound over his shoulder. He was losing a lot of blood, too much blood.

“Jemma,” he asked, his voice weak. “What are you doing?”

“Saving you,” she replied. “Just… just stay with me. Please, Fitz, stay with me.”

“Jemma, you need to… you need to leave, please.”

“I can’t. I’m not leaving you here. Fitz, Fitz… Fitz… please… please stay with me.” The tears were coming thick and fast now, leaving mascara marks down her face. “Please!”

He smiled up at her, eyes fluttering shut.

“Fitz!” She turned to look at Ward, eyes wide and pleading.

Ward just pocketed the hard drive and walked back to Jemma, and knelt down in front of her. He took her face in his hands and wiped away a tear but it was nothing like how Fitz had done it. It was rough and there was something about it… it was almost like he was teasing her.

He placed the gun in its holster and pulled out something else from his pocket.

“That’s an…”

“EMP,” Ward finished for her. “You know what this can do? What this can do to _you_?”

Jemma nodded slowly. “You don’t have to do this.”

“Oh Jemma, I do. With this, doing this, I can get rid of one of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s top agents, I can get the hard drive, and I can kill you.”

“Hydra doesn’t want me dead. Hydra wants me, Hydra _needs_ me.”

Ward shook his head, letting go of her. She dropped her head once she did, not wanting her eyes to meet his any longer. She couldn’t stomach the hatred in them. “We’ve not wanted you for months Jemma. Not since S.H.I.E.L.D. started to destroy us. But we can’t let you live, not with all your powers, your knowledge. It’s too much of a risk.”

“So you’re going to kill me?”

Ward laughed, hitting the button on the EMP. Within seconds, the lights went dark, the electricity of the building failing. And the technology keeping her alive.

She was going to die.

She was going to die and she had failed everyone again.

Her heart was clenching, unable to beat on its own. She loosened her grip on Fitz’s wound, unable to find the strength to keep holding on.

She collapsed to the ground, the tears streaming down her face now ones of pain and darkness clouded the edges of her vision. She heard Ward walking away and then someone calling her name, Fitz’s name.

She couldn’t place it, not yet.

Then, the darkness consumed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update this, I am planning to finish this over summer. There may 12 chapters and not 10. Thanks so much for all your support. It means so much to me!


	8. Chapter 8

An incessant beeping woke her, and she groaned as light flooded her vision. She closed her eyes again, the light painful. She covered her face with her arm and groaned again.

“I see you’re awake,” came a voice. Jemma peeked from underneath her arm. Bobbi. “How are you this morning?”

“Tired,” she replied, removing her arm from across her face and rubbed at her eyes before sitting up, wincing as she did so. “And in pain.”

Bobbi shrugged. “Having a major heart attack does that to you.”

“How did you…” Jemma began to ask. “How did you?”

“Save you?” Bobbi offered and Jemma nodded. Bobbi gave her a smile and made her way to the bed, checking the monitors that Jemma was attached to. “Once we found you and Fitz, it was easier to get him to speak. He said what AIM had done to you, what was keeping you alive. And with the lights out… it was easy to work out what had happened to you.”

“That doesn’t answer my question,” Jemma said, rolling her shoulders, stretching her muscles.

Bobbi smirked. “You aren’t the only agent with that technology keeping you alive. This isn’t the first time that we’ve had to deal with something like this.”

“And Fitz,” Jemma asked cautiously. “Is he okay?”

Bobbi smiled again. “He’s more than fine,” she explained, checking her watch. “Should still be in physical therapy.”

“For his shoulder?” Jemma tried to keep the panic out of her voice, and a yawn escaped her, and she fought to keep her eyes open.

“He’s fine, Jemma,” Bobbi reassured, placing a calming hand on her shoulder. “If it helps, rest. You need it.”

Jemma nodded, and slid back down the bed, and was just about to close her eyes when she remembered something. “The hard drive… I gave it to Ward… I gave it to them.”

“That doesn’t matter. We’re dealing with it.”

“I’m sorry,” Jemma whispered, her voice soft and broken, the realisation of what happened finally sinking in.

Bobbi, standing by the door about to turn the light out. “It doesn’t matter. We’re gonna fix it.”

But no reply came from Jemma as sleep had claimed her.

***

_She shook her head, refusing. She wasn’t going to give into their demands. She couldn’t. It was too dangerous. She couldn’t let that information fall into the wrong hands._

_A heavy sigh from the figure in front of her, then pain radiated across her face._

_The shock sent a blinding darkness across her vision and once she regained her sight, she spat on the ground, a bloody patch on the grey concrete._

_“Miss Simmons,” the voice asked, Daniel Whitehall. “We won’t ask nicely again. Just tell us the information and we’ll let you rest for tonight. Miss Simmons, this is in your best interest. We can’t make you comply, you and I both know that.”_

_“I’d rather die,” she hissed. “I’d rather die than tell you.”_

_Whitehall pouted. “You don’t mean that Jemma. Your gifts, their valuable, they can help change the world, make it a better place, and we can offer you that opportunity. Hydra can allow that to happen.”_

_She laughed, a harsh bitter laugh. “You think you’re changing the world, making it a better place… how many have you killed? How many have suffered at your hands?”_

_The punch from the guard was hard enough this time to knock her from her seat. She landed, a tangle of limbs, on the concrete. It was cold, grey and lifeless, chilling her bones. The guard, the one who was getting his hands dirty (because of course Whitehall didn’t want that. Why should he when he could employ people to do his dirty work for him?) pulled one foot back and his boot, steel toe capped of course, and made it collide with her ribs. Pain erupted through her and black splodges clouded her vision. She couldn’t help the cry that escaped her. She knew that at least three of her ribs where probably broken, and if she were unlucky, she would have internal injuries. The guard drew his boot back once again but it never made contact._

_“Sir.” It was Bakshi’s voice, Whitehall’s avid follower who seemed more than anything obsessed with the older man. “The machine is fixed we could use that. Try it.”_

_Jemma opened her eyes, and looked up at the men, towering over her, looking at her as if she were something less than human. Her eyes flicked between the two men, the Hydra guard having stepped back but a blood thirsty lust was evident in his expression._

_“It could kill her,” Whitehall observed._

_Bakshi nodded. “It could. But it could also get us the secrets we need. We can’t get them from our S.H.I.E.L.D. guest but our Inhuman guest here, we could try it.”_

_“And if it does kill her, Mr. Bakshi?”_

_Bakshi gave a wicked grin. “Then her secret dies with her. No one else can get that information. And we’ll just have to try harder with our other guest.”_

_Whitehall seemed to ponder this for a moment. “Very well.” He looked at Bakshi. “I expect results and if I don’t get them…”_

_Bakshi nodded. “I understand, Sir.”_

_With that, Whitehall left, and Bakshi knelt down in front of Jemma, taking her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him. “Miss Simmons, I do hope that we can get this little experiment to work. I do know how you love your science. And I would hate to be burying your body.”_

***

“Jemma?” he called out to her, watching as she tossed and turned on the bed, fighting the blankets. It looked as though she were having a nightmare. “Jemma!” He reached across to her, with the arm that wasn’t recovering from the bullet wound, and shook her awake, gently so as not to spook her. “Hey Jemma, it’s okay, you’re okay.”

She shot up in the bed, a scream on her lips and looked around. She seemed confused, as if she wasn’t sure where she was.

“Jemma.” His voice was calm and gentle, not wanting to scare her more. “It’s okay, you’re safe. You’re back on the Helicarrier. You’re safe.”

She looked at him, eyes wide and fearful. “I’m not there?”

He shook his head, and took her hand in his own. “You can read my mind if you want, see that it’s safe.”

Jemma shook her head. “No, no, no I can’t do that… Not again, not when I can hurt people.”

He smiled at her. “That’s okay then. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

“Promise?”

“I promise Jemma,” he replied, giving her hand a gentle squeeze, one of reassurance to show her that he was there and despite everything, despite all that had happened, it was going to be okay, they were going to be okay.

“Fitz?” she asked, and clarity flooded across her eyes and for the first time since she woke. She seemed to understand that she was in the medical facility on the Helicarrier. She shook her head, as if clearing her mind. “I’m sorry…”

“You’ve nothing to apologise for. I woke you, you seemed to be having a nightmare.”

“I was,” she confirmed, dropping her gaze, unable to meet his eyes.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

She shook her head, then seemed to reconsider. “It was… it was about Hydra.” She sighed.

“You’re safe. You’re here. They can’t hurt you. Not anymore.”

“But they… Ward… he tried to kill me. He shot you. He shot you,” she repeated, her voice a low whisper. “Oh Fitz, I’m so sorry.” She lifted her gaze again and it danced across his shoulder. His bandages were barely hidden by the loose-fitting shirt he was wearing.

“It’s okay Jems, we’re both okay.”

Using the hand that wasn’t in his, she wiped at tears that started to make their way down her cheeks. “Fitz, Ward… he has the hard drive. I gave him it.”

“I know Jemma, but we’re working on it. We’re going to get it back.”

“How? Fitz, I ruined everything! I’ve put everyone at risk! It’s all my fault!”

“Hey now,” Fitz chided, climbing into the bed beside her, carefully pulled her into his arms. She sank into him immediately, sobbing into his shirt, the cotton damp with her tears. He ran a reassuring hand up and down her back. “We’re gonna do this, like we’ve done everything so far.”

“Together?” Jemma asked, her voice muffled by his shirt.

Despite everything, a soft smile crossed his face. “Yeah, we’re gonna do it together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for all the support on this, I love reading all your lovely comments! Hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	9. Chapter 9

It had been close to a week since they lost the hard drive to Ward, since Hydra had it back in their possession. And May was confused. Confused as to why Hydra had wanted it back after they had sold it in the first place, why they would sell it only to send Ward to get it back.

“Maybe it was their plan? Bobbi suggested, pacing about Daisy’s office, the Inhuman sitting at her desk and May leaning against the wall. “Maybe they wanted the money and the hard drive, so they sent Ward to get it back, whoever won it, then that meant they got both.”

“I don’t think so,” Daisy said, speaking up. “Hydra have been losing funds for a while now, haven’t they? They could have made a second copy of the information and sold it, getting the funds they want and not losing the information they hold so dear.”

“But what about Ward?” countered Bobbi. “If they made a second copy, why did he say Hydra wanted the original back?”

“I don’t think that he was working for Hydra. Not really. I think he’s setting up his own faction of it, that he’s planning something.” Daisy sighed. “If he really was Hydra, then why did he try and kill Jemma? If he was Hydra, he would have taken her. Someone with her powers,” she paused, shaking her head. “They would be valuable to Hydra. They would want her, not leave her for dead in the corridor.”

Bobbi frowned, taking in her friend’s words but never got the chance to speak as May spoke instead. “You think Ward is planning something?”

“I _know_ Ward is planning something. He’s still bitter about Kara’s death, he’s still blaming us. He wants to hurt us, and having the drive, having that information, imagine the damage it could do.” She looked around the room. “I don’t know whose information is on the drive, but if what Coulson said was true, that it does contain information on superheroes and how to… the ways to defeat them, then we’re in trouble.”

“But,” Bobbi thought aloud. “If what you say is true then that means, what, we’re not only looking for one hard drive, one copy of the information, but two?”

Daisy looked at the other two women who was standing in her office, and nodded. “Yeah, yeah we are.”

***

The wind whipped her hair, causing it to fly everywhere and she shivered against its cold bite. She had been allowed out of medical that day, Bobbi having deemed her fit. And the first place she had headed was the outside of the Helicarrier. Despite the fact she headed being up there, leaning against the railing and not being able to see the ground, it was better than being inside.

Coulson had called a meeting, wanting to discuss their next move. But Jemma couldn’t attend, not with the feeling of guilt that resided in her. It was a harsh sensation, a painful twisting in her stomach that wouldn’t settle no matter how she tried.

It was her fault that Ward, that _Hydra,_ had the drive. While she had been in the medical, with the painkillers flowing her, her mental inhabitation had been lowered and she had been able to read the minds of all those that were close to her, that where near to her, and she had heard exactly that they thought about the situation. What they thought about her.

They blamed her, saying that it was her fault that all this extra work was being put in. It was her fault that they were all at risk.

She knew it was her fault, she had known since she handed Ward that hard drive. Since she gave him the information that could put so many lives at risk.

She should have ran when she had the chance, and she still did want to run, far away from here, where no one knew her and she could start again but she knew that it was no longer possible. S.H.I.E.L.D., they couldn’t let her go, they would never let her go. She knew too much, secrets she had seen in the mind of others, information that would be deadly if others got the hold of it. They would lock her up, in some unknown base in some location that she would never know the location of.

She sighed, and closed her eyes. This seemed to be her life. It had always been her life. Running, imprisonment, more running. More imprisonment. It was a vicious cycle, one that never seemed to end. All she wanted, all she had wanted for so long now was freedom, but it seemed as though it were a farfetched dream, something made of smoke, the wisps forever escaping her grasp.

With the wind blowing and the roar of the engines, she nearly missed the footsteps echoing on the metal behind her. When they were close to her, she turned and saw that Fitz was walking to her, a look of worry laced across his face. “There you are,” he whispered once he caught up to her. “We were… I was worried about you.”

She frowned at him, taking him in. You could see the very worry laced into his figure. “Why?” she asked, trying to keep the pain out of her voice. She shook her head. “Why are you worried about me?”

He reached over, his hand overlapping hers on the metal railing. It was comforting and warm, the complete opposite of the harsh bite of cold metal. “You weren’t at the meeting.”

“I shouldn’t be here Fitz. Look at all the pain I’ve caused. I put you all in danger. I shouldn’t be here.”

“No,” he replied, cupping her face and looking her in the eye. It pained him to his very soul to see the hurt, the anguish lingering in them. “That… that doesn’t matter.”

“But everyone, everyone hates me. And don’t, please Fitz, don’t deny it. You know my powers, my abilities… I heard them. They hate me Fitz and they have every right to. I put everyone’s lives at risk. Just because I wanted to save you.”

She wanted to advert her gaze from him, she couldn’t face looking at him anymore but his hand was still there, cupping her cheek, and it was nice. It was reassuring. It felt safe. She felt his thumb graze her cheek. He was wiping away tears. She closed her eyes, feeling the tears well behind them.

“I don’t care, Jemma. I don’t care. We’re both alive, and we’re both safe. And I don’t care if I’ve known you only a week. You’re… you’re amazing, magnificent. There’s just something about you… I can’t place my finger on it. Not yet… but I can’t… I can’t lose you. I don’t want to lose you.”

She opened her eyes, and found him smiling at her, his blue eyes soft and warm. “But the team…”

“They don’t hate you.” He leaned in close to her, resting his forehead against hers. “Use your powers. Read my mind. You’ll see that it’s okay.”

And she did, using her thoughts to find the memories that he was talking about, and trying to ignore the ones at the forefront. The ones that were about her, and so full of emotion. Eventually she found them and once she did, she left his thoughts, allowing her to attention to once again focus on him.

“You see,” he reassured letting go of her hand that was still on the railing and dropped the one that was still cupping her face, wrapping both around her waist. “I don’t care, the team doesn’t care. Anyone else’s opinions don’t matter.”

“And the other thoughts, the ones about me. What you feel, are they true?”

“They are,” he whispered, his voice nothing more than a breath.

And before either of them really knew what was happening, they were kissing, a tender kiss, full of love and emotion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the support on this, it means so much to me and I am so glad that you're enjoying it.


	10. Chapter 10

A week had passed since their first kiss, and they were still looking for Ward, for the two hard drives. They were making progress, it was slow, but they were making progress. Jemma kept to the edges still nervous, still blaming herself for the letting Ward take the first copy back.

He still hadn’t made the information public, not yet anyway, which was only confusing them, made them wonder was he planning on selling it to the highest bidder. And now there were two hard drives, possibly more. And that wasn’t including the fact that Hydra probably had the information stored within their own system.

Daisy was working on that however, creating a virus that could be used to destroy the information, that could be used to destroy Hydra. Bring them down. And Jemma, she knew she should be glad that she was working to destroy Hydra, helping to destroy those who had hurt so many people, who had hurt her. But her thoughts were a jumble and the main thing she felt was guilt.

They were still working out Ward’s plan, trying to work out what his motive was. And they were no closer to figuring it out until one Saturday morning, when the first information from the Coulson Protocols hit the internet. It was just information about the weapons, what S.H.I.E.L.D. used, but it only took seconds for it to be shared hundreds and thousands of times.

Twitter was a flurry of activity and once Daisy had managed to track down who had published the information, a mysterious figure named Brett, she knew that it was Ward.

“Brett… Is that…?” Bobbi had asked, leaning over the Inhuman’s shoulder, frowning at the screen and Daisy sighed, before nodding.

“Ward, yeah,” she replied, looking back at her friend, chewing on her lip nervously. “He used that name once, for an undercover mission.”

“You think this means something?”

Daisy nodded, turning her attention back to the computer, and refreshed Twitter, where a hundred thousand new tweets appeared, all about S.H.I.E.L.D., people discussing the weapons that had been leaked. Daisy knew that it was going to get worse before it got better. That this would make international news. There would be so many meetings involved with this. This mess… it would take weeks, months to clean up. “It’s a warning,” Daisy eventually settled on, letting out a breath. “He wants to scare us… he wants to draw us out, he wants to show us he has power. He has had so much time to release this information. And he’s only done it now, after all these weeks. He must… he must know that we’re looking for him, that we’re close to getting him.”

“So he’s making this public, because he’s scared he’s going to lose it, cause he knows we’re close.”

Daisy nodded, turning her attention back to Bobbi, a look of true fear written on her face. And Bobbi wasn’t surprised. That hard drive, it probably had all the information about Daisy on it, all about her powers, all about the missions she had taken part in. Classified information that only she and Coulson knew. Information that could be potentially dangerous, life changing. “We have to find him,” Bobbi whispered, her gaze flickering between the computer and the Inhuman, who just nodded.

“We do.”

***

He drew circle after circle and circle on the pad of paper he had in front of him, his pen spinning aimlessly as he sat in the meeting. The words were going over his head, he couldn’t care less about this meeting. Something Coulson had dragged him too. About the Protocols and Ward and the fact that he realised information about S.H.I.E.L.D.

Jemma was supposed to be there, but she had never turned up. They had tried to find her, but she must have hidden somewhere. In the end, they had given up, and went ahead with the meeting. They knew that she was fighting an internal battle, that she was blaming herself, so they had let her be. They knew it was for the best.

But Fitz couldn’t help worrying about her. It was a nervous fluttering stomach in his stomach and every time he tried to swallow, it felt like his throat was swollen shut, it was hard and it was painful. His mind kept wondering to her, wondering if she was okay, wondering what was wrong.

It got to the point where he almost missed the meeting ending. It was the sound of chairs scrapping across the ground that altered him to the fact that it was over, voices talking to one another. He sighed, closing the notepad in front of him and pushed back his own chair and followed everyone out of the room, his head down and his mind still racing.

The Helicarrier was still busy, agents rushing back and forth, speaking in hurried anxious tones, but the words just rushed over him, and they bumped into him, not even apologising as it seemed that their missions were more important than him.

Not that it mattered.

Stopping Hydra, stopping Ward, it was the most important thing at the moment.

Sighing and shaking his head, Fitz pushed open the door to his bunk and couldn’t help the noise of shock that escaped him when he entered.

“Jemma?” he asked once he had regained his composure, closing the door behind him and throwing his notebook onto the pile of clothes on his chairs, the thing sliding off and landing on the floor with a dull thud.

She looked up, and shook her head. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean… I didn’t mean to scare you.” She sighed, and dropped her gaze. She continued picking at a loose thread on his blanket.

“Jemma?” he asked again, more concerned this time. “You weren’t at the meeting…”

“I shouldn’t be here Fitz,” she replied, still not meeting his gaze. “I caused all this…”

“No,” he told her, his voice softening as he slid of his shoes, and padding across the room, sitting on the bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her. She sank into him, resting against him, nestling her head against his chest. He knew what she was going to say, what thoughts were haunting her.

“It’s all my fault,” she said anyway. Her eyes fluttered shut, the first tears clinging to them. “Everything, it’s my…”

“No,” he shushed her, hoping that he could reassure her, promise her that it was okay. “No, it was Hydra…”

“I just…” she tried, failing to find the words and for a while, they just sat there, curled up together, Jemma wrapped in Fitz’s arms, silently sobbing, until…

She pulled away from him, titling her head up, reading his thoughts and hating that she was doing it, but intrigued at the same time. Then she allowed her lips to dance across his own, the kiss soft and tender.

And once it turned into something deeper, something more passionate, Fitz pulled away, shaking his head.

“Fitz?” she asked, scared that she had overstepped some boundary, scared that she had read him wrong but he shook his head again.

“No, it’s just… I don’t want to push you.” He sighed, closing his eyes then…

“You know I like you, Fitz,” Jemma began, and he opened his eyes again, seeing how soft, how loving her expression was. “And I know… I want this too. I swear.”

He frowned at her, confusion flickering across his face. “You do?”

And she nodded, reaching up and cradling the back of his neck. His lips once again met hers, a deep kiss this time, fiery and more passionate and the hand on the back of his neck crept up, burying itself in his curls as he wrapped his own arms around her waist, and then she slowly lowered herself backwards down onto his bed, not once breaking the kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with this! So sorry for the delay! I had major writer's block but I do want to get this done, and before season five. I hope that you enjoyed this chapter and thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> There are a tonne of S.H.I.E.L.D. comic references in this, which is where I'm adapting the plot from, but you don't have to be familiar with them to understand this. Also I love Inhuman Jemma.  
> Title was adapted from New Americana by Halsey. Hope you enjoyed and thanks for reading!


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